Over the past year, God has blessed both me and my family

with things we could've never imagined. Last year was a struggle.

A struggle of which I survived and did my best no matter what happened.

This year I made different goals, strayed from the important things,

got caught up and too lost in the things I got, but not lost enough

to turn into a total fool.

This year I turned away people that love me, 

This year I developed habits that I'm not proud of.

This year is still here and I want to change that.

Change my mindset, change what I've become, what I've been all awhile.

I'm sick of what I've become, I don't like what I see,

I'm not what I want to be yet. And that frustrates me A LOT.

I'm still not good enough. Everything. Just everything. 

My piano, my studies, my other goals. 

I'm just not good enough.

I hate disappointing the people that have put so much

trust towards me to do better and all I do is let them down.

What happened to me? Seriously? 

Why am I not where I want to be.

Why am I not good enough.

I guess we all know the answer to that.

The obvious,

I'm just not working hard enough.

^^^^^